Yuku free message boards

It's escalation.



Here's a paragraph from another thread:

This addiction was followed by an increasing desensitization to the materials' pathology, escalation to increasingly varied, aberrant, and "rougher" kinds of erotic materials, and eventually to acting out the sexual fantasies they were exposed to. This might include exhibitionism, voyeurism, obscene phone calls, soliciting prostitutes, brief affairs, and even on occasion child molest and forced sex , most of the damage was through compulsive infidelity (sometimes infecting the wife with venereal diseases) and a destruction of trust in the marital bond which in many cases ultimately led to divorce and a breaking up of the family.

http://mothersagainstporn...iction.yuku.com/topic/550



To be entirely honest, at this point, I would be scared.



Here's a link:

http://www.protectkids.co...ts/patternofaddiction.htm



It explains the pattern that porn addicts tend to follow.



Here's another link to an article about pornography addiction. It too says "The viewer may start off with very mild porn, but that will cease to excite. They will slowly move into harder forms. When that ceases to excite, some form of acting out will happen"

http://www.truthminers.co...help_for_porn_addicts.htm







There is no time, place or event where it is appropriate for him to make comments about the abuse you received as a child. That's a clear sign of a sickness. A mentally healthy person would never make a comment of that nature, because mentally healthy people understand the repercussions for you. Until you figure out what to do, I would repeat, every time he does or says something of that nature "It makes me very uncomfortable when you say/do things of this nature." and leave the room. Do not let him guilt trip or convince you that he's what he's doing is harmless. It has little to do with his perception, with his arguments that it's "just you" but it's about what you feel and you perceive.



I believe you said he's military. I'm not sure which branch you said he's in, but for the navy, we have Fleet and Family Services, and you can go in, for free, and speak with a counselor. If you're in a navy heavy area, you can call and make an appointment with FFS. They service all branches. I would try to get him to go in with you: many times a third party is needed before they can even start to see what they are doing is not just detrimental to your relationship, but sick and abusive.







And, there is no real 'normal' for sex addicts, as far as acting out. They follow a similar pattern, but each SA has his or her own preferences, fantasies, addictions. No two will be exactly alike. That being said, I do recall someone who had a similar occurrence to yours, leading me to believe it isn't all that uncommon. It's his way of "acting out" and acting through fantasies. They do this, normally, when what they see in pornography no longer gives them the high they are searching for. It's likely replacing the pornography for that high again. That isn't to say he'll stop looking at pornography.





Finally, watch out for yourself. God only knows what level his escalation could lead to.



Well wishes,



*lyssa

Fleet and Family Support center website:
https://www.nffsp.org/ski...nffsp/home.aspx?mode=user

There's a location link on the website.

And the Marine Corps Community Services Website(which I think is similar to FFSC for the navy):
http://www.usmc-mccs.org/